Understanding Discipleship
According to a 2018 Barna study, 51 percent of churchgoers didn’t know what the Great Commission was; only 17 percent of churchgoers could recall what it meant. Two years later, Barna studied disciple-making in the American Church and found seventy percent of the respondents did not believe that discipling others is expected of them as followers of Jesus Christ. Critically, only 17 percent of the respondents in the American Church said that they had been discipled. These numbers tell us the purpose of discipleship is to lead men and women into the depth and knowledge of God and Scripture.
With numbers like these, we continue to see church participation is in decline, biblical literacy is staggeringly low, discipleship is absent, and Scripture seems more like a weapon for culture wars than a means of following Jesus. We find ourselves in a pivotal moment in the life of the Church within America, and discipleship is essential because the world is at stake.
We’ve noticed the current generation’s failure to articulate a Christian worldview, and the above numbers corroborate our observations. This generation’s ability to explain a historic Christian belief is radically deficient. This inadequacy is one of the significant contributing factors is the Church’s failure to teach the whole counsel of God to the younger generation and its relevance to every issue of life.
There is a shallowness to the broader Church—a lack of sober-mindedness where men and women of God are girding up their minds for action and eliminating worldly distractions so they can fix their eyes entirely on Jesus Christ. Many Churches and ministries exist that address discipleship, but there is still a need. Data like this dramatically highlights why the Lord has called us to work together to influence the Church in our community.
Through the Veritas Institute, Emet Ministries is dedicated to helping the Church in our community to change these devastating statistics and—God willing —alter the trajectory of discipleship in the Church. Within the Barna study, respondents explained why they didn’t feel like discipling others was their responsibility. For example, they did not feel qualified to address complex topics, did not believe they would be good at it, and did not think they were knowledgeable enough about the Bible to disciple someone. Others simply felt it was the job of the Church leadership. Whatever the reason, it’s clear that discipleship is not happening.
So, what is it?
In Matthew's final chapter, Jesus gives His disciples his last words while on earth. He tells them to “Go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son, and Spirit, and teach them to obey everything I have commanded.” We’ve come to call this the Great Commission. In light of the shockingly low numbers above, we believe this is one of the most important places to start when discussing discipleship: Jesus commanded it of his disciples.
Discipleship is a buzzword within Christianity. You’ve likely heard it a lot throughout your life, but I suspect you haven’t heard it defined often. To talk about discipleship probably conjures up many different images and ideas about what that means; some of those may not be positive ideas or memories, like forced scripture memory or awkward small groups.
There are many different ways you could define discipleship and what it looks like, but we believe discipleship is the process of being formed into the image of Christ for the sake of others. It’s something we all need to go through, and likely something we’ll never complete. For us, it involves discussing life issues, teaching young men and women how to pray, studying the Bible, and living life together. All of these things take time but are important ways for us to be formed into the likeness of Jesus.
The Purpose of Discipleship: Discipline
Like any habit or process, you won’t become an expert overnight. Like when learning to ride a bike or shoot a jump shot, you progressively get better and more competent as you practice and give time to a specific discipline. When you start riding a bike, you’re thinking about balancing, pedaling, and being afraid of falling over, but with time that part of riding a bike becomes instinctual. I’m guessing if you rode a bike recently you started pedaling without thinking twice. But, your discipline to a task begins to produce results. The purpose of discipleship is found and strengthened through discipline.
Discipline and being committed to a process is illustrated well in the book by Daniel James Brown entitled “The Boys in the Boat.” Daniel Brown tells the story of the 1936 University of Washington crew team who dedicated themselves to an extraordinary daily discipline of rowing so they could win the gold medal at the 1936 Olympics.
In his book, Brown describes a phenomenon that crew teams have difficulty in achieving called “swing.” As Brown describes it, swing only happens when all eight oarsmen are rowing in unison so that no individual action by any one oarsman is out of rhythm with the others. As Brown states, “Sixteen arms must begin to pull, sixteen knees must begin to fold and unfold, eight bodies must begin to slide forward and backward, eight backs must bend and straighten all at once. Each minute action—each subtle turning of wrists—must be mirrored exactly by each oarsman, from one end of the boat to the other. . . Only when this is accomplished does “rowing then become a kind of perfect language.” (161)
As rowers, they’ve achieved extreme competency through practice and discipline. But there is another aspect that is vitally important in this analogy.
As Brown explains, although smaller than any of the other rowers, the coxswain is one of the most important members of a crew team. He’s the smallest guy at the end of the boat, and his purpose is to communicate clearly and with purpose and authority to the other rowers in order to maneuver the boat and push everyone past their pain barrier to keep pulling the oars and win the race.
The sport of rowing is grueling and exacting. Some have suggested that rowing in one race is physiologically the equivalent of playing two basketball games back-to-back, but all within about a six-minute period of time! You don’t take time out in a boat race. There is no place to stop, get a soft drink, or relax your body. You focus your eyes on the rower ahead of you and row until the coxswain tells you it’s over.
Without a coxswain, a rowing team will underperform, and each teammate will row as an “individual” rather than in unison. As followers of Jesus, we can falter and underperform when we don’t have a spiritual coxswain. We need someone engaged in our life who can provide us with input and feedback to help us maintain our focus on the prize, which Paul calls the upward call of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. The purpose of discipleship is to be a coxswain.
There are many different ways you could define discipleship, its purpose and what it looks like, but as a starting point, discipleship is a lifelong process of being formed into the image of Christ for the sake of others. It’s something we all need to go through, and likely something we’ll never complete. In other words, it’s process and formation.
Trusting the Process
The first aspect of discipleship is to recognize that it is a process. It’s not something that will take root in our hearts overnight. Like developing any habit, being formed into the likeness of Christ takes time. Imagine the amount of time the disciples spent with Jesus. Of course, we don’t know exactly what their life together looked like or how much time they spent with one another, but for the sake of this thought experiment, imagine He spent every day with His disciples for three years; that’s 1,095 days they spent together. This would be considered an intensive discipleship program!
If you hang out with someone once a week (which by many accounts is a lot), it will take you 21 years to spend 1,095 days together. If you see someone once a month, it will take you 91 years to spend 1,095 days together. Three years with Jesus would’ve felt like a lifetime of discipleship at the rates we spend with one another. The point of this thought experiment is to show that becoming a disciple of Jesus is a lifelong process. To mimic the amount of time the disciples spent with Jesus would likely take us years or even decades.
How Are You Being Formed in Adult Discipleship?
The second aspect of discipleship is formation. Formation can be ambiguous, but the easiest way to think about formation is through this question: what type of person am I becoming? Many different things in our life exert a forming influence over us that, in turn, dictates the things we love and shape our lives. If I watch 5 hours of Netflix daily, what type of person am I becoming by doing that? If I consume two hours of news daily, what type of person am I becoming by doing that? What type of person am I becoming if I am in constant prayer and relationship with others? You get the idea.
Many things are exerting a forming power upon us, often in ways we are unaware of. One of the most transparent ways we see this is through technology usage. Among millennials, 1 in 4 people spend five hours a day on their phone, with fifty percent spending 3 hours a day on their phone. Some studies suggest that we touch our phones between 25,00-55,00 times daily!
Before we create further generational divides between Millennials, Generation X, and Boomers, what is fascinating throughout various studies is that while older generations might not utilize their smartphones similarly, they still consume a similar amount of media through watching television. While Millennials rarely watch network television and spend their time on Instagram or other social media apps, Boomers aren’t hitting up the TikToks but are religiously watching Blue Bloods on Friday night.
Part of discipleship is recognizing that the things that we give our time to are the things that form us. We want to be formed into the likeness of Jesus, so we take time to recognize how we spend our time and where we can give more of it to God and those around us. It isn’t always revolutionary; it might be putting our phones down to spend some uninterrupted minutes with our kids. Being discipled is essential because it clues us in on how other things in our life are forming us.
What is the Day-to-Day in Adult Discipleship?
Thinking about process and formation can sometimes be abstract, 30,000-foot-view-type conversations. Now we get into the nitty gritty, where the rubber meets the road, and how a lifelong process of being formed into the likeness of Jesus begins to take hold in daily life. It involves discussing life issues, teaching young men and women how to pray, studying the Bible, and living together. All of these things take time but are important ways for us to be formed into the likeness of Jesus.
We believe adult discipleship should be characterized by depth and richness. First, it’s an opportunity for young men and women to gather around a table and share their struggles and joys. They listen intently and offer encouragement and support as they talk and pray together, which fosters closeness and connection. That’s why we discuss life issues together. It’s a way to bear one another’s burdens in the Lord and hear what others might be going through.
We want to lead young men and women into a deep relationship with Jesus so that they are marked by being in His presence through worshipful prayer. Discipleship leads us into prayer without ceasing as we continually intercede for others. Prayer is a way for us to offer intercession and connection with those around us. We bring each others’ requests before the Lord, and we are hopeful and expectant and feel energized and renewed, knowing we powerfully encounter God's presence.
Scripture is a place to learn about God, ourselves, and the world. We study the Bible in a community with one another. We ask questions, share insights, and apply the teachings of Scripture in relevant ways to our life and the world around us. As a result, we have a deeper understanding of God's Word and a renewed sense of purpose and direction by being anchored to the Word of the Lord.
Lastly, we know that adult discipleship doesn’t exist in a void, and it takes shape as we live with one another. We spend time together, share stories, laugh, and build meaningful relationships through a shared faith. We support one another through life's ups and downs, providing a sense of community and belonging that is hard to find elsewhere, especially online.
We’ve found that working on projects, eating meals with spouses, going on walks, working on a ministry team, traveling to conferences, and many other activities have been meaningful ways to foster conversation around God, Scripture, and everything in between. We have benefited greatly by having intergenerational relationships in our life. We have a healthier attitude toward life and energy from being around people of all ages. We’ve found that regardless of age, reciprocity happens in all our old or young relationships. It’s a fantastic blessing to us —"mutual fruit" as Paul describes it in the Book of Romans.
The truth is, adult discipleship takes humility. It’s a willful acknowledgment that you don’t have all the answers but are willing to listen and learn from someone who might be ahead of you in their life and formation in following Jesus. However, it’s a step towards flourishing relationships between God and others, and that’s what we are all about.
What Discipleship Means
A common misconception is that what discipleship means and entails is reserved for “professional Christians” like pastors and church staff. Studies show that Christians feel ill-equipped when it comes to discipleship and there is mounting evidence that even pastors don’t view discipleship as the favorite part of their job. Pastors don’t enjoy discipleship, and regular churchgoers don’t believe they are qualified. This is where we come in by bridging the gap between the church and the Bible. We’ve found that what discipleship means is found in equipping men and women who are passionate for Jesus and the next generation.
In the Great Commission, Jesus’ final words to his disciples while on earth are, “Go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son, and spirit, and teach them to obey everything I have commanded.” At that moment, the disciples moved from being discipled to being charged with discipling others. It’s an important shift in the life of a follower of Jesus.
Unfortunately, many Christians feel unqualified, unskilled, or insufficiently knowledgeable to disciple others. That is why we started Emet Ministries. We want to instill knowledge, truth, and confidence in the next generation regarding their belief in God and ability to share that with others. In addition, we want to address people's insecurities and inadequacies when they think about discipling others. There will come a point in every person’s life when they are ready to pursue discipling others. We exist to help people bridge the gap from disciple to discipler.
You Can’t Multiply What You Haven’t Experienced
In II Timothy 2:1-2, Paul tells Timothy, his son in the faith, to “be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. And the things that you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses, these entrust to faithful men, who will be able to teach others also.” Paul expects Timothy to find other leaders and pass along what he learned from Paul, so they will then pass their wisdom and knowledge along, and on and on.
Submitting to discipleship, coming into a relationship with an older Christian where you can be refreshingly honest about your faults and failures and hopes and dreams, will— I believe—be a catalyst for spiritual growth and fruitfulness. But discipleship takes time, and it is hard work.
What discipleship means is having a discipler take the initiative and help someone else orient their life toward Jesus Christ. It is leading people to a deeper walk with Jesus, teaching them how to follow Him, teaching them Scripture, and helping them learn intimacy with Jesus through prayer and service to the church. Said another way, discipling another believer is an investment in another person that provides eternal dividends and leaves the individual to look high to Jesus, walk low in humility, and go deep into the Word.
What discipleship means based on Paul and Timothy is deep one-on-one intergenerational discipleship. We can’t overstate the importance of this. Culturally, there isn’t much respect for people outside of their generation, but we believe discipleship is an incredible and essential way to develop intergenerational relationships because we need each other.
What Discipleship Means to Us
Emet Ministries exists to raise a generation of disciples in the church community who can model Christlikeness, teach young men and women to walk in humility, and establish Godly goals so they can mature and lead their families to be salt and light in the community.
Discipleship is very rewarding—both to the young men and women being discipled and to the ones discipling. We might think someone in their 60s or 70s is giving everything in a discipling relationship, but in reality, they get to be used by God to help young people avoid the traps they fell into in their younger days. In addition, an older generation gets to provide what they maybe didn’t experience when they were younger: an older man or woman who could impart wisdom in work, marriage, relationships, raising children, and understanding the Word of God.
As a part of the older generation, I get to lay up treasure in heaven by investing in the lives of young men and women who will be leaders for this generation. Working over 45 years in the business world and ministry at my church has taught me many valuable lessons. Now I have the unique opportunity to pour that wisdom into younger generations. It is a rich blessing to be used by God in this way. I feel that I have lived my whole life for this moment. I get to “do life” with them and give them what I did not have when I was their age.
Discipling others comes as a tremendous and surprising joy. You don’t have to be my age to do it. What discipleship means is be willing to listen and learn about someone younger than you. Be ready to ask questions, impart wisdom when asked, and get to know them like any friend. You’ll be surprised how open and honest people will be when they realize they’re in a safe environment with someone who deeply cares for them. They’re much more receptive to Scripture, truth, and the leading of the Holy Spirit when they know they’re cared for by a friend and mentor.
Discipleship and the Church
If you’ve landed on this blog post but haven’t read the other three parts in this series, it’s helpful to understand why we think discipleship in the Church is essential and what it looks like to be discipled and disciple others (link the other three articles here). If you’ve landed here as a church leader, we want to be clear that our heart is to bolster and contribute to the work you’re already doing as a pastor and leader in your church and community. Two things we should address right away: discipleship isn’t a program, and you can’t disciple everyone by yourself.
Discipleship is a lifelong process of being formed into the image of Christ for the sake of others. It’s a process and spiritual formation that can’t be manipulated by plugging in the correct code or formula. You can’t program discipleship, outsource it to AI, or go at it half-heartedly.
Francis Chan, in his book Crazy Love, says, “We reduce discipleship to a canned program, and so many in the church end up sidelined in a spectator mentality that delegates disciple-making to pastors and professionals, ministers and missionaries.”
Discipleship is the work of the Holy Spirit in everyone and not just reserved for professionals. It involves discussing life issues, teaching young men and women how to pray, studying the Bible, and doing life together. All of these things take time but are important ways for us to be formed into the likeness of Jesus.
Secondly, if you try to disciple everyone yourself, you’ll eventually run into a capacity issue. Even Jesus didn’t do that! He called as many as seventy andhad twelve disciples, but there were only three men he had a closer friendship with.
As pastors and leaders in your church, can you recognize your 70, 12, and 3?
Discipleship in the Church
Due to a lack of understanding of Scripture and a robust knowledge of the Word of God, the church has become more of a reflection of the world than Christ to the world. The Lord called us to make disciples, and churches should reflect this. Jesus modeled the life we are designed to live within the Church community; the local church's health depends on this. The health of the Church will be directly proportional to the spiritual health of its leaders. Just like Jesus tells us in Matthew 7, “a bad tree cannot bear good fruit,” and an unhealthy leader cannot bear a healthy church. Because of this, the leaders within the Church need to be continually discipled by older and more experienced men who are ‘sages.’ I learned a long time ago that the key to growing a healthy church is to develop the present leadership since the congregants will not outgrow the spiritual health of their leaders. I’ve been committed to this principle my entire adult Christian life.
Older generations should value discipleship because it allows them to pour into the younger generation and pass along the wisdom they have learned throughout their lives. Titus chapter 2 is loaded with the truth about leadership development and the task of a disciple.
Leaders are to keep teaching the truth about healthy living to the younger generation. Paul told Titus to be a living example to the younger men—to come alongside them so that the younger men could ‘trace’ their lives after him. The entire passage in Titus implies having a close relationship with the young men so that they learn ‘sound doctrine’ and healthy living from the older men. The same holds true for the ladies in the church. The older women are to be in a relationship with the younger women so that they can teach them the importance of reverence and love in the home so that the Word of God would not be dishonored.
Older men and women in the Church who disciple younger men and women get the satisfaction and joy of seeing God use them in ways they could not have imagined. The older generation has the privilege—and the responsibility—to pass along the truths of the Christian Faith to the next generation so that there are ‘sages’ in that generation to help the next generation grow in faith.
Discipleship helps members of the Church community grow and mature in Christlikeness. I believe discipleship is more than reading a book with a young man and then moving on to the next young man. Discipleship is for life, so we want to partner with churches. This is a huge task that you can’t do on your own. You may not be discipled by the same person for life, but being in a discipleship relationship for life is essential.
The longest I have discipled a young man is nine years, and we still meet today. I expect we will meet as long as the Lord gives me breath. Christian Barrett, the co-leader of Emet Ministries, asked me to disciple him for the rest of my life. What a blessing to be given the honor and the opportunity to impact a young man's life for many years to help him avoid the griefs of life that you experienced because you may not have had a discipler guiding you through life.